Celebrity Cage Match 2: Enraged Employee Edition Round 3
Versus
The Fight
🥞 Denny’s (Grand Slam Greg) vs. 🍝 Olive Garden (Breadstick Bruno)
Grand Slam Greg wiped the grease from his brow and said, “Last time I saw pasta, it was trying to charge me a service fee.” He fired jam grenades and rode a syrup wave into Bruno’s breadstick perimeter.
Breadstick Bruno knelt, whispering into a meatball. “He knows not the sauce… nor its burden.” He launched rigatoni rockets and summoned ghost waiters who spilled imaginary water everywhere, causing battlefield confusion.
Greg fought through the bluster and asked, “Did you make that sauce today or 2 months ago?”. Bruno, never one to back down in a pissing contest, exclaimed, “How many pigs in a blanket did you serve today? Oh wait…. I mean Pigs in Crates.” Greg snickered and replied, “Well, at least I’m allowed out after 9 pm on a weeknight!”
The Final Blow: Greg made one fatal error—he asked, “Do you validate parking?” Bruno nodded solemnly. “No one ever leaves.” Toast slipped on an emotional ravioli and vanished into a permanent Olive Garden booth. Bruno wins. Olive Garden advances.